Yesterday I went to the fourth birthday party of a poly married couple’s daughter (my first birthday party of a friend’s child!). It was a mix of polyamorous and monogamous folks, and honestly, the only way I knew who was who was because I knew who their partners were (though this was the first time I actually met them!). It turned out there was another extra poly couple there, and I had absolutely no idea.
The kids were all very happy and loud, and the whole thing was incredibly… normal.
Of course, not all polyamory looks quite this traditional, but I think it illustrates that this isn’t quite about completely contrasting relationship styles. To me, it’s about informed choice. Knowing your options and your needs/desires, and then deciding what you want your relationship or relationships to look like.